Tiger

I dreamed this tiger was outside trying to get me. I had to scramble down this two or three story tower to get into the house, so I threw a rooster at it to distract it.

Archie Adam was there. We were about to embark on some road trip or train trip. I beseeched him to only spoon me. I wanted to sleep next to him, because I’d been months and months without human contact. Yet knowing that he’d recently broke up with his girlfriend, I was afraid that more would happen and my resistance would be non-existent.

Well, we got back home and met up with Noah and low and behold, Kevin. There was this like old-west style flop house, but it was in Mt. Shasta. Kevin says he’s leaving to go home soon, so he’s sorry I can’t stay with him, but that you can rent rooms here for really cheap. I look at him kind of like he’s stupid. I have a place here after all. In fact, hadn’t Noah, Adam, and I just come from there?

At some point I took a bath/shower, but it was weird because it was two bath tubs next to each other. Noah was in the inside one to my left. There was a curtain dividing them. I started running a bath because Noah was taking a shower. He’s like, “Why did you take a bath?”

“I was waiting for you to get done so there would be water pressure to wash my hair.” I get a patented, ‘ok you’re a werido look’ as if that’s somehow stranger than the side-by-side tubs. Then I am running around this two story house looking for Quinn who has been picked on by the neighborhood orange tabby that someone let in. Cici is there too. At first Quinn is skittish with me, but then she starts licking me.

Analysis:

The big cats that keep appearing in my dreams I am beginning to feel like are symbolic of my sexual repression, which by the way I plan to continue indefinitely, and my terror of my emotions for Jonathan. These emotions are so intense and seem to appear from nowhere that I have convinced myself they are delusions. I try to let them drop, to let them go, to maintain some semblance of friendship, yet even most of me thinks I should let this go as well. How can I be friends with someone I feel this way about who does not feel the same? Awkward!

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